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Your worse perdicament - out in the field; not in a bar.


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Some of these stories have me puckering now just reading them.  I only have one, and it happened last year.  Got home from North Dakota in late October.  Waited until December to tell my wife I was leaving for Arkansas in January. 

Almost didn't make it out of that one😀

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I was hunting elk in the Buffalo Peaks area of Colorado and I ran into a friend who was there with a couple of his buddies. I was hunting off my horse Comanche while they were afoot. On about the seco

I once told my wife that every year I was going to go hunting out of state for two weeks.

I had recently moved from North Dakota to Minnesota, I was duck hunting on a friends land. He had all the proper gear so all I needed was waders, gun and shells. This day I was hunting alone on a smal

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The crazy ass electrical storm we had here last night that knocked out power from midnight til 3AM reminded me of something! Some years back we went on a vacation trip to Durango CO. We flew into Albuquerque NM in late afternoon. The weather was ominous when we got into our rental car. Turns out we were driving through the desert in a historic electric storm. We didn't know any better until we listened to news reports later that this was the worse in years and nobody was on the highway (but us apparently) . The rental car was a POS and was almost conking out if I went over 50, and halfway across the desert the low tire pressure light came on. It was fricking crazy, with lightening all around us, crap strewn across the highway, winds that swerved the car around. It was past white knuckle territory. After an eternity, we finally started to hit small towns, and everything was closed, but I tried to find a gas station where I could put air in the tires. We pulled into a few in the pitch dark with feral dogs snooping around us, and transients lurking in the corners asking us for money. Not a great way to start a trip. We made it though, and swapped the POS rental car with another one at Hertz at the Durango airport. They were awful to deal with, despite renting us an unreliable car, and made us drive a good 9 miles to fill up the tank or were gonna charge us a ridiculous fee. I'll never use them again. 

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 I had recently moved from North Dakota to Minnesota, I was duck hunting on a friends land. He had all the proper gear so all I needed was waders, gun and shells. This day I was hunting alone on a small pond surrounded by a few feet of cattails and trees. I was not very familiar with the area and especially the flowing waters thru slews in Minnesota. In North Dakota you are usually up to your waist in mud before ever getting close to the water not so in Minnesota. I was hunting around Ashby Minnesota this is hardwood on rolling hills country dotted with lakes and slews.

 

The morning hunt was over and I had a few ducks on a string around my neck and my lab for company. Early season bluebird sky and warm so It was still only about 9am. The pickup was in an old farm yard about 1/2 mile away. The Friend told me there are usually a few pheasants in the surrounding low areas. I decided to walk a little of this on the way back to the truck (still wearing my waders).

 

I walked from the duck blind thru some hills to the lowland area. I made it thru the heavy cattails and was in the transition area between the cattails and some reedy type grass next to a very small waterway say 2-3' wide at the most. I walk toward the water. The next thing I know the bottom falls out under me. I catch myself on the way down. I find myself arms straight out to my sides like I was crucified. I am obviously on an inside turn of a substantial creek with moving water or a spring, As I kick back there is simply no bank to touch and no bottom. My right hand is holding onto grass, my left hand has a gun and grass. The water is only about 2" from the top of my waders. I manage to let go of the gun and get a better hold with my left hand but I cannot pull myself up at all. I was very sure I was about to die once my arms started to get tired. This situation was no joke.

 

I let out a light whistle, my 65lb 1year old lab came over to me. She very calmly  laid down by my right wrist. When I grabbed for her collar the water almost topped my waders. Once I had Janey's collar (1" strap) in my hand, she sat up a bit with her front legs stiff, facing the water. I said a prayer, started kicking like mad and lunged at her collar with my left hand. I ended up both hands on her collar kicking like hell. She did not bolt lay down or fight in any way, she sat there firm and I made it onto the bank. I cut those bleeping rubber waders off with my knife, picked up the gun and walked to the truck in my stocking feet with my dog at heal.

 

The neoprene waders that essentially float are the duck hunters best friend and were not around back then

What is perfectly safe one place may not be somewhere else

I was in my 20's and was working red iron, if this happened today I would be dead

Janey was with me for 12.5 years and I cried like a school girl when she died

This still creeps me out today

 

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Hunting quail one day with a friend's friend. An unexpected wild flush and this Phucker pulls up shoots and I fall to the ground with my right ear ringing and warm. I vaguely remember catching the barrel in my peripheral vision about ~ 6 inches from my head and dropped just as he swung through and pulled the trigger.

 

Couple years ago while working on the boat dock with my father, a 4 ton snatch block broke free from 10 feet up, sounded like a cannon fired, and shot straight at me. I flinched but took a shot across the top of my head. Fell over, dazed, bloody mess, got the bleeding stopped, cleaned up and finished project and made 5 hour drive back home headache and all. Wife took a look at it when we got home and said, please go to the emergency room. Got the the ER and when seen by the nurse all I heard was, oh boy, oh boy. Doc came over and said yeah that's bone. Ended up with 8 staples and was told I was lucky; had I not flinched, a good chance of the block taking me out. Fortunately I didn't fall in the lake as there was no one who could have jumped in to help me. My father came around and asked, "you alright"? Neighbor across the cove yelled, "Gawd Damn, you alright over there"?   

 

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I’ve been pretty lucky with no fatalities

  Got swamped and the boat turned turtle in a winter snow storm that blew up suddenly. Got everyone to shore and then walked about 3 mi soaking wet in 30 degree weather before another boat picked us up.

  Had the dog run thru a hornets nest surrering multiple stings. She was really in bad shape and I had to stash my shotgun and carry her about a mile back home . She recovered  but it took her a couple of weeks. 

 Once had my lab snake bit and had to carry her back to the car. Luckily we were only about 300 yds from the car. She recovered .

  Finally took a pretty bad fall out of a tree stand .  Lucky to only get a few minor cuts and got my bell rang pretty good. I’m not sure if I was knocked out or just dazed but once I wiggled my toes and ascertained I hadn’t broken anything I had to sit there for  a while to get my head together so it could walk back to the cabin. Those are probably the worst over 40 years or so.

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I guided duck hunters in Bayou Meto near Stuttgart Arkansas several years while my dumb ass was trying to figure out agriculture was the worst job in America. I have been in, out, and under more duck boats than I want to recall. I have literally had the hat shot off my head, without a scratch, but the worst is always falling through ice. Too many times, I'm gonna quit thinking about all that crap now, hell Dick why did you bring this up, I'm not buying you a drink now this October! But I might sing you a dirge............. 

Billy

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Funny one: my old Lab girl  and I were getting on in years. She had cataracts and arthritis but a lot of heart.   I took her out jump shooting along a spring creek that stayed open in late December.   Along the way to that creek was an overflow pond from a sewer treatment plant.  The department that ran the plant said the water was more pure than the spring creek.

 

Dog saw a duck come in low over the treatment pond ice,  went out on the ice of the to check it out and broke thru about 10 yds out.  I called her back but she didn't have the strength to pull herself out, and the ice was too thin to hold me.  She was getting weak and hypothermic, struggling less and looking at me.   So I called my wife, told her I was going to go after the dog, if I didn't call her in 5 or 10 minutes come and get me and bring a rope. I'd heard the pond was shallow.  

 

Left my phone, wallet, shotgun, pants, jacket shirt on the shore, stripped  down to skivvies, put my boots back on ,  opened the leather punch blade on my Leatherman, figured to use it as an ice pick. Stamped on the ice to break it  and Instant stink, like waves coming up from the bottom. Made me gag.  It might have been clean , but it still stank.  

 

When the water hit my privates it was a shock.  It stayed shallow, broke my way to the (smelly) dog,  got her out. Put clothes back on. Jogged back to the truck,  drove home with the dog near the heater on the front seat floor. Truck upholstery , floormats, and me all smelled for days even after shampooing, the  dog too, boots too.  The skivvies got trash canned.
.

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I just got back late last night from a fishing trip to BC.  My Son and friend were on a remote river that took some doing to get a permit to fish.  We were crushing it.  I was catching 18-20" cutthroats with each cast on a tiny stream.  2 hours into the day, my friend hooked his leg on a sharp stob and tore a good 10" V-shaped chunk of skin loose from his calf.  The problem was that he is on Coumadin and was bleeding very vigorously.  We had nothing but flies, tippet, and some snacks/water.  I sent my Son for the car to bring it as close to us as possible and got to work.  I peeled the feathers off a #12 nymph and sewed him up with 3x tippet.  It was a bit tough pulling the eye through his skin, but to my credit, I did a pretty good job.  Then I dressed him with his own shirt and boogied for the truck. The ER doc noted that this was the first time he had to pull stitches to put new ones in.  The doc was a young guy and was a little intimidated when I told him I had 30+ years of ER experience, but still did good work.  My buddy owes me and my kid a day on the river. 

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I'm a city boy.

 

Years a go field hunting geese in a cut corn field with two others.

 

Lying down in the field, heard a lot of noise coming our way---a herd of cows were walking toward us.

 

I'm a city boy

 

I'm scared poopless....never been around cows and worried that one of them might bite.

 

One of my friends said, "Don't worry about getting bitten, just worry about getting your ass stepped on."

 

When we were done, the cows found my Subaru.   Licked all the salt off the car.  Broke both of my side mirrors licking them.

 

Hated (live) cows ever since.  Now when I eat a steak, I say, "Gottcha back, you bastards."

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  • 3 weeks later...
WI Outdoor Nut
On ‎8‎/‎15‎/‎2018 at 4:17 PM, Hub said:

 

Was this the old Cedar Bridge by chance?  I used to mountain bike that area myself.  One of my favorite stories (not near death related) involved me shooting carp off that very same bridge one spring day.  The bridge is closed except to foot and bike traffic and I would perch on the old pipe railing and shoot carp as they swam by and pile them on the bridge decking.  I had a deal with a local bait shop guy who used the carp to feed leeches.  One afternoon some crazy animal rights woman sees what I am doing and decides to holler obscenities at me as she speeds by on her bike.  Her only problem was that while she was unleashing her tirade at me she failed to notice a sizable carp that had flipped into her path and when she hit it full tilt with the bike she went down like a ton of bricks.  She was all scun up and smashed up and full of splinters from the old wooden decking.  What was worse from her perspective was that she landed almost at the feet of the dirty redneck she was just taunting a few seconds before.  I will never forget the look on her face.  Priceless!

Yes it WAS!  Great area to ride.  I can imagine you shooting as well, and not everyone loving that idea. 

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