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Rogue Hunter

Jokes anyone?

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bennelli-banger

          If you're not paying for sex you're paying WAY too much!

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Big Al

A termite walks into a bar and asks "is the bartender here"?

 

A penguin walks into a bar and asks the bartender if he's seen his brother?  Bartender says "I don't know, what's he look like"?

 

A chicken walks into a bar and the bartender says "we don't serve poultry".  Chicken says "that's ok I just want a drink".

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ccavacini

fly.jpg

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Big Al

A blond finds herself in serious trouble.

She has lost her business and she's in dire financial straits.

She's desperate so she decides to ask God for help.

She begins to pray....

"God please help me.  I've lost my business and if I don't get some money, I'm going to lose my house as well".

"Please let me win the lottery".

lottery night comes and somebody else wins.

She again prays....

"God please let me win the lottery, I've lost my business, my house and I'm going to lose my car as well".

Lottery night comes and she still has no luck.

Again, she prays....

"God why won't you help me?  I've lost my business, my house and my car.  I don't often ask you for help and I've been a good servant to You.

PLEASE let me win the lottery this one time so I can get my life back in order".

 

Suddenly there is a blinding flash of light as the heavens open.  The blond is overwhelmed by the voice of God, Himself...

"Sweetheart work with me on this... Buy a ticket".

 

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dogrunner

C153C530-028F-4335-859D-099FD063D96E.jpeg

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Treerooster
16 hours ago, ccavacini said:

fly.jpg

 

Ya gotta love the casting in that scene.

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Geoff Roznak
1 hour ago, Treerooster said:

 

Ya gotta love the casting in that scene.

😀😁😂🤣

 

Ouch....great pun!

 

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Mike da Carpenter

When asked to give a brief description of the accident, they got this...

 

67D9F6AA-D592-452A-8504-03706B3B0C9A.jpeg.79320c8822b05cf6488a0747fe41872f.jpeg

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tut

That time of the year:

 

 

turkey.jpg

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dogrunner

71A75A95-BAEC-4975-971A-12180ECA6A25.jpeg

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dogrunner

B3C29CD8-3961-4468-AA16-71AD770E9644.jpeg

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tut

This is my Sophie, hands down. 

dog.jpg

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ccavacini
A man and his wife were awakened at 3:00 am by a loud pounding on the door.

The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger,
standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push.

"Not a chance," says the husband, "it is 3:00 in the morning!"

He slams the door and returns to bed.

"Who was that?" asked his wife..

"Just some drunk guy asking for a push," he answers. "Did you help
him?" she asks.

"No, I did not. It's 3 in the morning and it's bloody pouring rain out there!"

"Well, you have a short memory," says his wife. "Can't you remember
about three months ago when we broke down, and those two guys helped
us?

I think you should help him, and you should be ashamed of yourself!
"God loves drunk people too you know."

The man does as he is told, gets dressed, and goes out into the pounding rain.

He calls out into the dark, "Hello, are you still there?"

"Yes," comes back the answer.

"Do you still need a push?" calls out the husband.
"Yes, please!" comes the reply from the dark.

"Where are you?" asks the husband..

"Over here on the swing,"  replied the drunk..

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Rogue Hunter

Best one yet!

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Mike da Carpenter

AA101B05-A697-421F-8B1F-54C8A5B32F45.jpeg.28b94e676a45413c72ff5476decd2136.jpeg

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